The other day I saw that saying “You cannot raise your children the way your parents raised you. Because your parents raised you for a world that no longer exists”. I absolutely agree with this statement . We are raising our kids in cruel world today, where everybody gives themselves a right to be mean and rude. Where friendship lost its value and their peers are often only there when they (peers) need them. And if the child is nice, kind and sensitive, he becomes a target.
We need to build our kids to be resilient. But how? By toughening them to develop a thick skin? Sometimes it works, but not for every child. Children need to feel heard. They need connection. They need to trust adults enough to come to you and share anything on their soul and heart. By talking to them, parents give them space and safety, comfort, that beautiful place that they often cannot find outside in this cruel world. Parents need to model peace and demonstrate stability in their own actions. And, while doing all of this, parents should always remember to teach them to still love others, while knowing where to draw the line and set boundaries. Children need to know when to say “I am not taking abuse”. Children need to know when to walk away.
Lastly, internet literacy is the most important. Give them that much internet that you know their brain can comprehend and is enough developed to be able to grasp. We know that if they post something once on social media (either personal photos or some kind of statement), it is always there. Even if they change later, it will hunt them forever (we know through public personas such as Justing Trudeau and his insulting Halloween costume when he was young). Their photos and comments might become magnet for bullies, pedophiles and weak souls that need to feed their egos through someone else’s suffering.
Love your kids. Love them every day. Be there for them. Make your home sweet and happy place. Agree to disagree and love them through disagreements. Make them feel safe with you. Make them love being with you at home.